It does feel like many lives lived. Was that me who sung in pubs in Nepal or tought yoga in broken Spanish in mid-Argentina, was that me standing almost naked in Times Squere asking people to switch to vegetarian diet for the upcoming year. I have lived in 6 countries and visited over 40 in my 31 years. My work has almost always involved some kind of travel and getting in touch with local ways of being, behaving and thinking. And in most of my travels I have been no more then by myself with trust that life will take care of me no matter what. And it did, so I was also never lonely on the road since encounters with incredible people were happening in each journey. Almost like universe would be sending me the right lessions presented by right people at the right times.
I am also happy that I made so many travels in my 20-ties since travel learnt lessions shaped my personality, as well as then I could afford more travelling since I did care little how comfortable I sleep, what is the quality of food I intake and how efficiently I spend my holidays. I did what felt right, responded to my souls calling and adventoured. I do miss that mindset and hope to reserve time to wonder, adventour and just be in every upcoming year of my life.
Not only activism has taken me across the World, but it also has led me to meet increadible people, visit projects that build and sustain local communities and simply kept me believing that there are enough of us trying their best to make the world better, more peacfull and just place for everyone.
Even after having seen the darker side of activism, feeling upset, desperate and frustrated with people and things going for worse, I cannot imagine my life without taking a stand and being ready to go protect and seek ways for more peacful coexistance. And at the end of the day, if there is noone to inspire me, make me trust in the good in the World, I can be that one myself, since through trusting that I can be good, I start to trust that the World might be that way too.
I have had continous love affair with smoothies since my trial year of living on a raw food diet back in 2006. Add mangos, coconut, cocoa beans, strawberries, spinach, cale and so much more and go to heaven.
I have constantly invested in blenders or addictively searched for ways to nourish myself with smoothies on my travels in diverse World countries. Yet, in fact, I think one of the reasons I was so fed up of living abroad was that living in each different country means buying and transporting yet another blender and getting all other items to make my food/sleep etc. as comfortable and pleasurable as possible. It is also probably one of the reasons, I love enjoying cold Latvian winters in warm places where the harvest is fresh and place has many places that make great smoothies and vegan food (particularly Chiang Mai). Even one of the boys that I was dating was especially appealing due to the fact that he kept making increadible breakfast smoothies.
Now, since I moved back to Latvia, I can harvest and freeze summer berries for use in winter smoothies. Bringing me vitamins, creamy texture, raw freshness of fruits and veggies, as well as joy, uplifting memories and energy to go through rough days. In fact, I will go make one, right now.
My earliest memories of meditation practice goes back to 2002, when my guide/teacher in activism convinced me that, if I am to bring a change in the World, I need essential tools for self care. Thus straight away I responded to the random flyer inviting passers by to come and learn the benefits of meditation by Sri Chimnoy devotees. I remember looking at the 27 year old female meditation practicioner, talking about her experience of this spiritual practice and glowing inside out. I wanted to be the same way at that age. Powerful, peacful and glowing from the ability to touch both the light and the dark of the self. I admired those abilities and promised myself to work torwards it.
Since then many years have passed and, I have visited many Buddhism centers, meditation retreats, met many teachers and guides, yet have not been able to maintain constant meditation practice. And in the age of social media, flashing movies and fast phased living- it has become even more difficult, yet even more essential. I do return back to meditation in times of stress, confusion and times of sadness and joy, breathing bravely through this particular passage of life. I know that this is a place where I can contstantly return and where I am always welcome. Always. Whenever and wherever.
I am increadibly greatful that this tool of observing mind, having a taste of nothingness, staying present has been gifted to me at considerably young age. And that I have been able to share it, pass the insights of the experience and practice to groups and individuals.
Also knowing that meditation is just one of the ways to touch what is already residing in me, have a space for myself to feel, to witness, to make a choise for the right words and behaviours; a breath before deciding what to reply to the e-mail; a moment spent wishing loving kindeness to another. A space made between spaces. To live, to breath, to be.
(Add that was made for national railway for their campaign to promote commuting by train, while creating time for self.)
This year I have been dedicating quite some time and space for deep dives in oceans of self, seeking ways how to bring my gifts, talents and abilities to the best use for myself and the World. This has been also a year, when I promised myself to work with my deeply held beliefs of ''me not being worthy enough'', ''me not being knowledgable enough'' and the list goes on. Thus I would like to devote the remaining time- up to my birthday- to celebrate spaces, people, things, processes that have enriched my life througout these 32 years on the planet. And even more- force myself to review the story of my life and write and reflect and look for the beauty hidden in darkest places of self and the World.
It's time to celebrate!